Tuesday, September 18, 2007

So Shiny!

So, back to the Renaissance Festival that I attended with my posse on Sunday. We were all delightfully attired in beautiful, HAND MADE costumes that took my friends Larue, Randy, George, Girl Jess, and I approximately one billion hours on Saturday night to make. Which is why when Larue announced on the way home from the festival that we should wear ENTIRELY NEW costumes next year, we beat on her with our half-eaten turkey legs.

I, for one, want to wear my belly-dancer costume everywhere, and think it should be my new look for the office. I bet I'd get more listings that way...

I was not alone in my love for my costume. I know what you're thinking - horny drunk old men were checking me out, right? Asking "my lady" if I would shake it like ye olde Polaroid painting? Wrong (well, okay, a couple did, but not enough to be obnoxious). My biggest fans were all about 2 years old and of the female persuasion.

That's right - I was accosted all day by little toddler girls, who fell madly in love with my shiny shiny outfit. They'd come toddling up in their tiny toddly way and splat their tiny toddly selves onto my skirt. Then, with their tiny, grubby hands they'd reach waaayyyyy up to try and grasp the dangly coins on my hip scarf. Most were too wee to reach the goal of my big-fat booty, so I'd have to scooch down so they could make it. Then, they'd jingle the coins, they'd jingle the beads, and basically coo in awe in their widdle cutesy baby voices. I was just too shiny NOT to touch. Meanwhile, their parents looked on in horror, afraid that by mere contact with me, I'd turn their precious darlings into tiny turbo sluts.

It got to be so MUCH attention that my friends thought I should just grab a hat, put it in front of me, and charge the kids for a costume fondle. Now, I'm all for making a quick buck, but I think it would have opened the door for more, shall we say, inappropriate behavior from the other fair-goers.

But by the end of the day, I'd made about 10 little baby girls happy with my shiny self, and horrified a whole slew of parents. Yes! I felt like the boys from Motley Crue! Ugh. That's kind of icky if you think about it.

If you want to SEE my actual costume, too bad. I don't have a picture of it yet. Be patient, young Jedi, I'll be posting it soon.


Event of the Day: The Minnesota Ren Fest - and the tickets are under $20 each. Plus, everyone and their mother gives away coupons. Check your local paper, gas station... shoot, I got coupons at two different parades this year.


4 comments:

C. Larue said...

Its true - you were a child magnet. Although I think you would have liked to have snagged the hottie in the kilt with the big puppy. Just sayin'.

Also - as I said before, it was like you had all your money hanging from your ass - all those coins. What child wouldn't be fascinated by that?

As for the fest next year, there WILL BE NEW COSTUMES. Decree I, um, yes.

These are not the costumes you are looking for...

The Cheap Chick said...

"Stick it in your pointy ear..." Just kidding. Fine then, I want ANOTHER belly-dancing costume next year.

C. Larue said...

NO NO NO. Wenches, I say. Wenches!

And who is Randy?

The Cheap Chick said...

Who is Randy? Who is the naughtiest of us all? Who walked into my home and annouced she had just gotten... some action? Randy little miss that she is!
And you are NOT the boss of me. I want to be a belly dancer, dammit.